The Three Worst Super Bowl Halftime Shows Ever
Three not-so-super halftime shows of yesteryear (and no, Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake aren’t mentioned).
1. Super Bowl XXIII (1989)
The title for this ill-advised acid trip of a spectacle was “Be Bop Bamboozled,” which is appropriate considering how viewers must have felt after watching a Solid Gold dancer-turned-Vegas impersonator/magician named Elvis Presto confusingly croon lots of non-Elvis songs and perform what was billed as the “world’s largest card trick.” Oh, and did we mention the entire thing was in 3-D? (The third D was for disturbing.)
2. Super Bowl XXVI (1992)
This positively chilling Minneapolis-set “Winter Magic” theme offered up super-peppy figure skating champions Dorothy Hamill and Brian Boitano, creepy dancing snowflakes, and precocious tykes rapping about Frosty the Snowman (sample lyrics: “Yo, Frosty! Yo, Frosty! Yo!”). And who better to headline a halftime tribute to all things ice and snow than the lead singer of….Miami Sound Machine???
3. Super Bowl XXIX (1995)
Staging an entire halftime show to promote a Disney theme-park ride? Sounds about right. National treasures Tony Bennett and Patti LaBelle were somehow strong-armed into this shameless 12-minute ad for a new Indiana Jones attraction, with Indy rescuing the Super Bowl trophy from Temple of Doom-like thugs before proclaiming, “I’m giving it to the winner of Super Bowl 29!” There were no winners here.
– Dalton Ross
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